Don’t Delve

Don’t delve around in the mud,

Searching for the lost parts of yourself

In a quagmire of regret and loss.

The lost parts of yourself aren’t there,

And nor are they lost,

For the self watches you over your shoulder

Aware of the mud on your face

And the oily stink between your fingers

As you dredge up your shameful

And sordid past,

Offering yet another ugly

Memory for memory to feed upon.

Instead, climb up upon the bank,

Sit in the sun, allowing your mind

To drift free from the sludge

Of past chronicles.

Your lost self was never lost,

And sits, enjoying the sunshine

Smiling kindly upon your tribulations.

It was you who was lost, not yourself,

Who’s love for you

Was never in question.

Spring Prayer

Newly minted air

Made new by the night

Holds spring

In its spaciousness.

The world is awake

And tender

As the first-born greens

Of beginnings

Brought forth

Again, and yet again

In timelessness.

Being dances

To the steadiness

Of the sun,

Lives as a prayer

To the becoming of the one

Who holds

The delicate flower

And weight of the earth

And else innumerable,

All secure

In boundless,

Infinite nothingness.

The Path

In the ever present now

We find ourselves

Expanding

In knowing –

That we are infinite being

At the crisp edge

Of happening:

Becoming ourselves

In the unfolding of the universe.

And sometimes we forget,

Dawdle lazy

On the road

Of our making:

Obstacles scattered

By our own hand

That make the journey

Seem tiresome and long

And effortful.

And sometimes we remember

The ever present now,

And step inside ourselves

And the universe,

And the being

That we always were,

And see

We too are always infinite,

And the road

And its obstacles

Are but illusions

On an illusionary path.

Only Our Thoughts

Only our thoughts

Deny the lifting spirit

Holding us buoyant

In the being alive.





Only our thoughts

Cage our minds,

Eclipsing

The wealth

Filling us

Until brimming,

Until our hearts

Are overflowed.

Only our thoughts

Obscure the love

Streaming out

Through ever cell,

Streaming out

Irrepressible:

Infinitely giving,

Infinitely wise.

Only our thoughts,

Our harmless thoughts,

Our transient

Substance-less thoughts

Believed to be strong,

Believed to hold

Power over us,

Believed for so long.

Only our thoughts

Are burnt

Under love’s internal sun,

And brought to nothing,

Our bonds loosened

As thoughts are seen

In freedom,

Seen for what they are:

Just fleeting thoughts,

Not owned,

But passing through

Unhindered, unclaimed, unchained

From who we are.

Rest Awhile

Come thought,

Dogged and persistent,

Rest awhile,

For you have laboured

And toiled and tried

Yourself weary.

Rest awhile

For there is nothing

You can do,

Nothing you can improve

Or fix or even make right.

The world is as it is

And you are small,

A child in all of this.

Rest awhile

For the thoughts you think

Only momentarily eclipse

The love

That holds you in the world.

Rest awhile

And you will see,

You will feel,

All is well,

All is as it should be.

Spring Morning

I step into absolute stillness.

On the horizon

Mist shifts in ethereal veils.

The houses on the hill disrobe

Slipping from their misty dreams

As the sun begins in the East.

I step into absolute stillness.

The oranges of early morning

Warm my cheek and raise

A fresh scent from the succulents

As they absorb the first light.

The stillness pervades

Holding all things:

Beauty arises

In all that is worldly,

Both natural and made

Are vivid in the same way,

Reality seems to have a texture I can taste,

One which my eyes drink in.

I breathe a luxurious breath.

I exist

And I step into absolute stillness.

Ⓒ Ben Truesdale 2020

Joy

Joy in the twittering birds

Alight the air,

The wingbeat uplifting;

A fleeting moment

Agrasp the twig in bud.

Joy in the first bees

Suddenly innumerable.

Joy in the fly

Sunning himself on the leaf,

Absorbing the nutrient

Of the sun.

Joy in the exuberance

Of every plant,

Plump on the moment.

Joy in the resonance

Of the wood pigeon’s throat,

The highlighting of treetops

And branching canopy.

Joy in the morning mist

Shrouding the distance,

Enrobing the far away

In a joyous dream.

Joy in the saxophone

Wafting from the neighbours garden.

Joy in the children’s voices

Lost in the their play.

Joy in the sound of a car

Thrumming up the hill.

Joy in the stink of cat shit

Enlivened by the warmth.

Joy in the body

And joy in the body of the world.

Joy in everything.

Alive

I breath in

I breathe out

I feel my lungs full

I feel my lungs empty

I feel the life move in

I feel the life move out

I feel my lungs irrigated

With freshness

New as the spring bathed leaves

Are vivid

Spacious as the spring air

Is light

I breathe in

I breathe out

Life is within me

Life is without

I breathe in

I breathe out

I value the life of my being

I value the presence of my life

I breathe in

I breathe out

Life in its essence is simple

I love the simple essence of life

I breathe in

I breathe out

I am alive in existence

Existence is alive in my life

I breathe in

I breathe out

I breathe in

I breathe out